Hi Margaret,

I saw your cry for help and I figured I could lend you a hand. I was diagnosed with NVLD when I was 11yrs old and I felt like such a freak. I was angry, and lost. I had 0 friends and knew nothing about how to socialize. The most important thing I can tell you is that instead of telling your daughter what she is doing wrong (I guarantee that she is beating herself up enough), tell her and make her understand that she is not abnormal. She needs to feel safe in her own skin. When my parents tried to coach me, the only thing that went through my head at that age was "How would you know what I'm going through or what I should do. I'm a freak and nothing you say will ever change that". It wasn't until I said that outloud that they understood that there was nothing they could say that would change that. I went to therapy with a psychiatrist who specialized in learning disabilities and he became a wonderful outlet. He listened and always took my side, he told me that things would eventually get better, and when I started to ask his opinion and advice he would tell me what I was doing that was so off-putting to the other kids. Through him I learned patience, and understanding and today I have a good social life, and am compensating for all aspects. Your daughter probably already thinks she's wierd, don't tell her that she is. Be her good reinforcement, talk her up so that she knows that you are on her side 100%. Being weird is a good thing I think because life becomes interesting. It is likely that she won't be entirely part of the cool-kids gang, but that is ok. She will do fine, but tutoring, therapy etc are all good things to think about! Just remember that she daughter for life so just be there for her and things will be ok, it is her journey after all!