Pushing Academically: Is it worth the strain in the long run?

Hi Quinn,

It feels strange to say that to someone other than my son who is also a Quinn with 22q, age 8.  He was diagnosed when he was 4 yrs. old.  My Quinn E. is in 3rd grade, a self-contained classroom for the L-D in a public school system.   We can't afford a special L-D school for him, especially since we've been unemployed for 2 yrs.  I just recently moved 6 hrs away to work with the US Army Corp of Engineer.  I am considering taking a position that would deploy me overseas so that I could make substantially more money and be able to send Quinn E. to a private L-D school.  I want to give him the best chance that he can get in life and I will sacrifice for him to do that.

Quinn hates school!  It is very hard for him and he knows it and feels the strain.  He gets very frustrated!  He will say, "I hate my brain!" I know his ADD is contributing to his difficulties substantially.  We are trying to find a medicine that can help him.  I have been just like your Mom, Sally, his warrior.....and his tutor and support......until now since I had to take a job elsewhere.  His Daddy doesn't have the perseverance or patience to do what I did.  I have always pushed and encouraged and will continue to do so as long as there is hope......hope that the efforts will be beneficial to him such that it helps him become a productive, independent, contributing person in society that is also happy.

I just finished reading your book.  It is inspiring which is ultimately why I bought it.  Seeing the struggles of my son, I needed to hear something inspiring from someone with this condition.  But, it was also disheartening.  With all of the advantages you had for academic help (tutors, best schools, etc.), I am saddened that your struggles and situation is such that you still cannot live a totally independent life.

Has all the strain and pain of academically pushing proven to be a benefit for you or not?  Going through that is hell socially and emotionally.  I am trying to decide at what point is all the push and shove and brain strain taking more from my son than it will give to him in the long run.  I am one that doesn't give up and will do whatever is necessary in life.  But, when do you know enough is enough with pushing for the ultimate result can't be reached...or can it?  I don't want to short change my son in any way, but I don't want to beat a dead horse with the effort.  And I want him to be happy in life.

Please offer this mother some advice.

Sincerely,

My son's warrior, Linnea

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