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Question
Sara Oglesbee
Sara Oglesbee
Category: Mental Health
01/21/10

What is the best advice for self-esteem for a 17 year old ?

My son is 17 and contiinuously ask why did I have to have this? My sister is fine and I have had 2 open heart surgeries, I can not play sports, and I have to go to so many doctors. It's not fair. Why did God make me this way? We have tried to be positive, encoraging, and supportive of all he does( manager of basketball team during middle school, but would not continue high school). Academically he is on 3rd grade level but tries socially to be apart of what he can at school with some of his peers. Doesn't like church because he sees it like school, doesn't feel confident enough. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

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Btn-expert Merely Me
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Mother and Writer with an M.Ed in Special Education

My most important job in the world is to parent my two boys. My...

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Hi Sara

 

May I ask, what is your son's diagnosis?  I know this must be so hard for both you and your son.  There are certainly no easy answers.  It truly isn't fair so it may be good to validate your son's anger and frustration.  I would also point out his gifts and talents and let him know that everyone is unique. 

 

I am thinking that your son may enjoy coming here and seeing how other teens and young adults deal with their learning disabilities.  Show him examples of other people who have also struggled to cope with their challenges but have gone on to lead very successful lives. 

 

Do you think that a social group with other teens would help?  Would having him talk to a therapist or counselor be of any benefit? 

 

You are a terrific mom...compassionate and caring and this will help your son immensely just knowing that you are around to provide that love and nurturance.

 

Let us know more and maybe we can brainstorm about more resources and/or information to provide to you.

 

Thank you for reaching out here on Friends of Quinn.

trc7880
trc7880
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trc7880 is tom chase
born with severe disabilities.

I was born with severe disabilies, after battling with dozens of...

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Hi I didn't have two heart surguries but had one and the dr's still told me to stay away from contact sports, I know exactly how your son feels, Although my sisters are younger they had nothing wrong and are model type looking women very pretty, I was always jealous still am a little bit and very low selfesteem, I'm not an expert just speaking from experiance I would try and encourage your son to explore things he can do, find out what his interests are even try to devolope some interests for him. I was the same way although I was able to do some sports not a lot but some, and those were my interests If he likes managing a basketball team see if there's any camps in the area to help with that there are all sorts of sports camps now adays even without physical contact or see if he would like to manage other sports. Sometimes encouraging and supportive isn't enough my parents signed me up for stuff to do because I wouldn't I didn't like it back then but appreciated it now because it got me out of the house. I didn't sign up for any after school activities because school was the last place I wanted to be there are other things you can do even if limited, I even got into some martial arts when I got older because of how well my heart was doing, even though the docs said I wouldn't be able to do anything at all like that. Keep it going don't give up, it's good that your asking advice, I have 22q-11 deletion syndrome with all sorts of complications it was very hard growing up, although I don't know what your son has I can only imagine what it was like for me growing up. I hope everything is well and goes well with your son.

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